GrasshopperNotes.com - Thoughts for inspired living


April 7, 2014

Hiding from Hurt

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 6:59 am

C573265 mThere’s a game many of us play and it’s not much fun. I call it “Hiding from Hurt.”

You play when you pretend that something doesn’t affect you. The best overt examples I can think of come from football and boxing. When a football player or a boxer takes a vicious hit, they oftentimes smile and shake their head at the perpetrator as if to say, “that was nothing.” They are hiding from hurt.

Hurt is cumulative if you let it go unacknowledged. It multiplies rather than abates when you keep it locked away behind “private” gates.

Hurt is an anchor that keeps your forward progress to a minimum. You can only go so far carrying that weight.

There’s a song from the late 60s whose lyrics suggest a strategy to come out from hiding. It’s a strategy of admission. The song is “I’ve Been Hurt” by Bill Deal and the Rhondels. The opening lyrics don’t mince any words:

“I’ve been hurt (hurt)
Hurt (hurt) hurt (hurt)
Yes, I’ve been hurt

I’ve been hurt like
I’ve never been hurt before.”

What keeps us from admitting? One answer is the perception of appearing weak or vulnerable. You can almost appreciate the response of the football player or boxer, not wanting to look weak. They want the opponent to think they’ve taken their best shot and they’re still standing.

That strategy outside the ring is far afield from a solution.

Acknowledging hurt is the first step in “shaking it off.”

Hurt is a feeling that needs to be acknowledged and fully felt before it can even begin to make an exit. You may always remember the experience but the pain will start to subside when you don’t let it hide.

It takes some bravery to come out from hiding but the reward is a lightness that can’t be weighed.

All the best,

John



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