Here’s a “Flashback Friday” Golden Oldie from The Grasshopper:
“Expectation vs. Entitlement”
It occurred to me recently that expectation and entitlement are intertwined but with a huge difference.
Entitlement contains expectation but expectation doesn’t necessarily contain entitlement.
An entitled person expects a certain level of whatever they think they’re entitled to without having to do anything to get it.
A person expecting something is expecting something in return for an action they’ve taken.
Expectation has some quid pro quo (something for something) attached to it whereas entitlement epitomizes something for nothing.
“I expect respect” is something both an expectant and entitled person may utter but one has done something to earn it; the other is looking for a handout.
How do you tell if you’re entitled? It’s pretty simple. If you expect something for “just being you,” the only thing you’re entitled to, and will receive, is a long wait.
A person with a realistic expectation has done something besides “being them” that’s worth consideration.
Ask any therapist how many times they’ve heard the sibling story – “My mother loved my brother/sister more.” When the therapist digs a bit deeper, they often find their aggrieved client owns the title of entitlement in their family.
Here’s the hard reality: We’re entitled to nothing. The push-pull universe doesn’t respond to entitlement because it’s not a real thing. It’s something we made up.
The sooner we make up our mind to leave entitlement in our past, the sooner we can expect to see some return on our actions.
All the best,
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