GrasshopperNotes.com - Thoughts for inspired living


March 18, 2009

Disdain

Filed under: John Morgan's Blog — John Morgan @ 6:57 am

Disdain: Scorn, contempt, derision, condescension, disparagement, disregard – to regard somebody or something as not worthy of respect.

We all contain disdain.

How often it comes out to play is a barometer of how well we are playing with others. Its frequency of appearance can also be a predictor of our health and well being.

Setting politics aside and just observing behavior, is there any doubt in anyone’s mind that former Vice President Dick Cheney is a poster boy for disdain? Watch him speak with the sound turned down on the TV, so you don’t let his words influence your observation and assessment of his demeanor. He is consumed with it.

If you have ever seen radio personality, Don Imus, you get to witness the same facial contortions of contempt.

Watch some footage of the trial of Saddam Hussein and witness the derision he exudes.

All of these people have/had friends. There is something about them that certain people like or admire, but their number of playground skirmishes indicates it’s more prudent to avoid them. They’re hard to get close to.

What is missed is how this mindset plays havoc with your insides. I have yet to meet a person who is filled with disdain that doesn’t have some kind of internal matching component.

Don’t believe me, prove it to yourself. Do your best impression of their facial expressions and then pay attention to how your body feels. Is it constricted in a certain area? I trust you will find there is a correlation between what shows up on your face and what’s happening in your body.

I don’t have clinical data to back up my contention of accuracy, only a lifetime of observation.

Let’s pretend that it’s you who is crammed with condescension. How will you know? Ask someone. They’ll tell you in a New York minute. You can also discover it yourself by paying attention to how constricted your body feels when you contort your face.

What do you do with that health robbing, people repelling pattern of behavior?

You begin by noticing it. Start to notice when your face contorts and you begin snarling. That’s your cue to take a nice comfortable breath and sigh it out. This is built in pattern interrupt for human beings. It’s a tension release. There is quite a bit of tension, both external and internal, that goes along with disdain. You may need to take a few more breaths than the average bear to notice a change in your demeanor.

Also, recognize that the facial expression you’re using is really posturing. You want people to see that you’re disdainful. You want them to know you are right and they are wrong. What you may not have noticed is that it isn’t working for you – inside or outside.

Disdain never convinces anyone to come over to your side and it plays havoc with your bodily system and internal organs.

The Grasshopper has told us that some people would rather be right than happy. What he didn’t mention, as overtly, is that some people would rather be dead than happy.

Disdain equals demise. The sooner you recognize and remedy that, the sooner your health and demeanor improve.

Like all diseases, it’s best if you catch it early.

Borrowing a phrase from my late Uncle Vinson, “Disdain is a pain in the drain.”

All the best,

John

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