Anger is a Bodyguard that Keeps You Isolated - Grasshopper
When you are aware enough to interrupt your anger, you find a connection that's always been there.
Some famous people have bodyguards to keep people away from them and from causing them harm. It's deemed a seeming necessity for them and an option for us.
Anger is an emotion that has its uses. It may spur us on to do something that needs tending to that we wouldn't have had the energy for unless we were angry. Those scenarios usually fall into the blue moon category.
Most anger is a conversation in our head that manifests "fight or flight" feelings in our body. Anger is really a fear. It fears that someone is going to harm us and it walls us up from that threat by exuding scary behavior - thus keeping attackers and everyone else away.
The attacks for the most part are mind made projections - illusions. We have crafted this under siege story in our head and given the characters lines to speak. We have rehearsed long enough that the scene seems real. We truly are wonderful method actors.
Anger is like a doting parent. They mean well but stifle your growth. Anger is a useful emotion but its applications are limited. Reminds me of a story . . .
I have this "artistic" friend who can really draw motorcycles. He loves bikes and has been drawing them since he's been a kid. If you need a drawing of a bike, he's the guy you would consult first. The difficulty crops up when he finds out that I need some drawings for CD covers and posters for new products that I'm developing. He wants to do the artwork. If I request something that is subtle and not in your face, he cannot deliver. He doesn't believe that's the case because he thinks he is so versatile, when in reality, he only has one speed. In the past when I gave in and allowed him to do the artwork, my products stayed on the shelf. Most people are not drawn to pastel motorcycles.
People avoid people who display a lot of anger. Just being in their presence brings uninvited, uncomfortable feelings into your body. You find a way to excuse yourself and keep them at bay.
Anger can be your friend but if you let that friend take advantage of your friendship, you will find yourself disconnected from life.
Anger won't allow you to connect with others and participate in life. Anger will give you perceived safety with an isolated existence and a gnawing, internal energy that insidiously wears down your body and your health.
Letting go of your anger begins by noticing that you are angry. Again, there are appropriate places for anger to materialize but if it's your constant state of mind, you are missing the abundant life that is your birthright.
Notice the conversation in your head about being angry and notice the feelings it produces in your body. Then notice, no matter how "good" a person you are, that people back away from you or withdraw their attention from you when you are angry.
Just the simple act of becoming aware of your internal state allows an exit door to open. You are given an option to walk through and reconnect with life. If you keep the door locked and guns at the ready, it's true, no one will get to you but you will eat canned rations your entire life.
Step up to the all-you-can-eat buffet of life and sample the sweetness. Connect with your fellow dinner companions and enjoy the camaraderie you'll never find in the solitary confinement known as anger.
All the best,
John
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