Who Can’t You Lie To? - Grasshopper

The TV character Dr. Gregory House had a catchphrase he used in many episodes: “Everybody lies.”

We all do it from time to time. And that got me thinking . . .
Who can’t you lie to?

Well, I came up with four people you’d be a fool to lie to.

Now, you can lie to them. It’s just not in your best interest.

The first three are pretty obvious:
Your doctor.
Your lawyer.
And your therapist, if you have one.

And then there's the fourth.

The most important person you should never lie to.
Yourself.

That reminds me of a story . . .
Years ago, I was talking with my mom on the phone. She was telling me about her upcoming doctor's visit and was quick to point out that she would tell him everything as I had previously recommended. She added. “including the one glass of wine I have every day.” 

I asked her, “Are you going to tell him you drink it from a goblet?”

She laughed.

And, of course, the joke wasn't far from the truth.

We have a remarkable ability to tell ourselves a story that makes our behavior sound a little better than it really is.
And when we do that, we're not fooling anybody. Least of all ourselves.

Lying to yourself is denial in its purest form.

And sooner or later, the truth starts gnawing away at the lie. Whatever you're trying to deny has a way of showing up again.

And more often than not, that lie will eventually bite you in the ass.

All you're doing is delaying the inevitable.

You may think that if you don't acknowledge a problem, it'll somehow go away.
It won't.

It'll be waiting for you tomorrow. Or next week. Or next year.

And here's the sad part.
You usually know when you're lying to yourself.

You know what you're avoiding. You know what you're making excuses for. And you know when the explanation you're giving yourself doesn't quite pass the smell test.

It's not a secret.

So, what do you do if any of this hits a little too close to home?

Here's a suggestion.
Future pace your lie.

In other words, take a good look at where that lie is headed.

Imagine the situation you're likely to find yourself in if you keep doing what you're doing. Don't look away. Don't make excuses. Just follow the consequences to their logical conclusion.

Then deal with it now.

There's a reason the old expression “Pay me now or pay me later” has stood the test of time.

Deal with it now, and you've given yourself the best odds of a better outcome.

Put it off, and the bill keeps growing.

And when it finally comes due, you'll be paying tons of interest.

I know this isn't complicated. It's common sense. Anyone can understand it.

What I don't understand is this . . .
What do we think we're getting by keeping the lie alive?

Because if you know you're lying to yourself, you also know you're not getting away with anything.

You're just postponing the day you have to face it.

And that day has a way of arriving whether you're ready for it or not.

All the best,